744 Rolling Stones Jokes That Will Rock Your Funny Bone

If you’ve made it here, it means you’re ready to dive into the world of Rolling Stones jokes.

Not just any jokes, but the top tracks of humor.

That’s why we’ve compiled a list of the most hilarious Rolling Stones jokes.

From rock-solid puns to rhythmically-charged one-liners, our collection has a joke for every facet of life.

So, let’s jam into the heart of Rolling Stones humor, one joke at a time.

Contents show

Rolling Stones Jokes

Rolling Stones jokes are a rock-n-roll fueled laugh-fest that will get you chuckling in no time.

The jokes aren’t just about the legendary band and its members, but also the rock culture that surrounds them.

From their infamous bad-boy image to their timeless hits, the Rolling Stones offer a rich vein of humor to mine.

Creating the perfect Rolling Stones joke involves a mix of wordplay, pop culture references, and a dash of musical history (like the band’s ageless appeal or their notorious rivalry with The Beatles).

Ready to roll with laughter?

Jump on the bandwagon and get ready for a wild ride with these Rolling Stones jokes:

How do you make a Rolling Stone’s day? Just give them some “Satisfaction” and they’ll be rolling with joy!
Why did the Rolling Stones become meteorologists? Because they wanted to forecast rock showers all around the world!
How do the Rolling Stones take their coffee? With a side of rock and a pinch of roll!
Why do the Rolling Stones love playing at construction sites? Because they enjoy getting stoned!
How do the Rolling Stones keep their clothes wrinkle-free? They rock and roll all night and iron all day!
Why did the rolling stone never join a gym? It preferred to stay in its natural rock-hard shape!
What’s the Rolling Stones’ favorite dessert? “Brown Sugar” ice cream with “Ruby Tuesday” cherries on top!
What’s Mick Jagger’s favorite type of pizza? “Satisfaction” with extra “Jumpin’ Jack Flash” peppers!
Why did the Rolling Stones become mechanics? Because they wanted to fix cars and rock and roll at the same time!
Why did the Rolling Stones hire a chef? Because they wanted to have some rock and roll for dinner.
What did the Rolling Stone say to the dentist? Can you give me a tongue(tungsten) cleaning?
Why did the Rolling Stones hire a gardener? Because they wanted to make sure they were always on a Rolling Stone tour!
Why did the Rolling Stones get kicked out of the grocery store? Because they couldn’t resist rolling their own stones.
What do you call a Rolling Stone who can’t play any instruments? A rolling dud.
What’s the Rolling Stones’ favorite type of cereal? Stone-Os! They’re rockin’ good!
What’s the Rolling Stones’ favorite way to relax? Rolling on the floor laughing at their own jokes!
Why did the Rolling Stones start a pet grooming service? Because they wanted to rock ‘n’ roll with their furry friends.
How did the Rolling Stones get their laundry done on tour? They used the tumble dryer (tumblin’ dice).
Why do the Rolling Stones love playing board games? Because they always get to roll the dice!
What do the Rolling Stones call their favorite type of exercise? Rock climbing!
What’s Mick Jagger’s favorite type of sandwich? A Rolling Sub!
What’s Keith Richards’ favorite type of rock? Sedimentary, my dear Watson!
What did the Rolling Stone say when it bumped into another rock? “Hey, you rock my world!”
What did the Rolling Stones say when they finally stopped rolling? “We rock and stopped!”
Why did the rolling stone go to therapy? It had a lot of unresolved rock ‘n’ roll issues!
How do the Rolling Stones keep their drinks cold? They use “rock” cubes!
What do you call a Rolling Stone who can’t find their car keys? Keith Richards!
What’s Mick Jagger’s favorite cereal? “Rolling Stones”!
What do you call a Rolling Stone that never moves? A stationary rock band.
How do Rolling Stones fans greet each other? With a “Hey, hey, you, you, get off of my cloud!”
Why did the Rolling Stones start a gardening business? Because they wanted to be a rock and rollin’ garden band.
What did the Rolling Stone say to the geologist? “I’m a rock star, baby!”
How does a Rolling Stone pay for its expenses? With rock and toll money!
Why don’t the Rolling Stones like to play hide and seek? Because they can never get no satisfaction!
Why did the Rolling Stones become dentists? Because they love “Painting It Black” on cavities!
What did the Rolling Stones say when their drummer got lost? “We can’t get no direction!”
What do you call a Rolling Stone who becomes a chef? Mick Jagger-n-Eggs!
Why did the Rolling Stones join a knitting club? They wanted to start rockin’ some woolly jumpers.
What did the Rolling Stone say to the geologist? “Don’t take me for granite!”
What did one Rolling Stone say to the other when they were stuck in traffic? “Hey, let’s rock and roll out of here!”
Why did the Rolling Stones start a pizza delivery service? Because they love rolling out the dough!
What did the Rolling Stone say when they met a famous mathematician? “You’re a real “rock” star!”
Why did the Rolling Stones become personal trainers? Because they wanted to help people get in “Rock ‘n’ Roll-shape”!
What do you call a Rolling Stone who can’t play guitar? A rock that rolls!
How do Rolling Stones calm down? They take a “Rock ‘n’ Roll-aid”!
Why did the Rolling Stones join a gym? They wanted to get ripped like their album covers.
What do you call a Rolling Stone that’s afraid to roll? A Mick Jagger-laggard!
What did Mick Jagger say when he tripped over a pebble? “Hey, start me up!”
Why did the Rolling Stones start a gardening club? Because they wanted to rock and roll with some Rolling Stones… from the garden!
What do you call a Rolling Stone on a skateboard? A Rolling Skater!
Why don’t the Rolling Stones ever get lost? Because they always have their GPS set to “Start Me Up”!
How did the Rolling Stones become so good at skipping stones? They practiced rock and roll!
What did Mick Jagger say when he found a shiny rock? “Hey, look, it’s a Rolling Stone!”
Why did the Rolling Stones start a gardening club? Because they couldn’t always get satisfaction from rock-n-roll, they needed some satisfaction from growing moss!
Why did the Rolling Stones become archaeologists? Because they were tired of living in the past.
Why did the Rolling Stone go to the doctor? They were feeling a little “rocky” lately.
Why did the Rolling Stones go to the gym? Because they wanted to get a little more rock-hard!
Why did the Rolling Stones start a bakery? Because they wanted to make “Gimme Shelter” bread rolls!
What’s the Rolling Stones’ favorite type of cheese? “Blue & Lonesome” cheese.
What do the Rolling Stones call their tour bus? The “Rock ‘n’ Roll Express”!
Why did the Rolling Stone refuse to date the geologist? They didn’t want to be taken for granite!
What did the Rolling Stone say to the mountain? Hey, I’m on a roll, wanna rock and roll?
What did the Rolling Stone say when they tripped and fell? “I guess I just “rolled” with it!”
Why did the Rolling Stone refuse to move? It was on a roll.
What do you call a Rolling Stone who can’t play an instrument? Mick Jagger!
How do the Rolling Stones ask for directions? “Can’t get no satisfaction, can you point us in the right direction?”
What do you call a Rolling Stone who is afraid of heights? A rock bottom.
Why did the Rolling Stone become a gardener? It wanted to plant some rock and growls.
Why don’t the Rolling Stones ever get lost? Because they always know their way around the Rolling Hills!
What’s the Rolling Stones’ favorite exercise? Jumpin’ Jacks.
Why did the Rolling Stones get banned from the bakery? They kept stealing all the rock buns!
What do you call a rolling stone that’s lost its balance? A rock ‘n’ roll-ercoaster!
What did the rolling stone say when it reached the top of the hill? “I’m on a roll!”
Why did the Rolling Stones join a gym? They wanted to rock ‘n’ roll with some dumbbells!
Why did the Rolling Stones become archaeologists? Because they wanted to rock and roll all night and find fossils every day.
Why did the Rolling Stones start a fashion line? Because they wanted to rock the “Sympathy for the Devil” look!
What did Mick Jagger say to his dentist? “Hey, you can’t always get what you floss.”
Why did the Rolling Stones fail as meteorologists? Because they can’t always get what they want (weather-wise)!
Why did the Rolling Stones open a car repair shop? Because they love giving “Rolling Tunes”!
What did the Rolling Stones say when they found a diamond in their garden? “Hey, we’re Rolling in the Stones now!”
How did the Rolling Stones fix their broken guitar string? They used Mick-tape!
Why did the Rolling Stones switch to a plant-based diet? Because they wanted to rock and roll with leafy greens!
Why did the rolling stone become a geologist? It wanted to learn more about its own kind!
What do you call a Rolling Stone who loves to garden? A rock and a roll-ing gardener!
What did the Rolling Stones say when they saw a big boulder? “Now, that’s what I call a Rolling Stone!”
Why did the Rolling Stone break up with its girlfriend? It felt too boxed in and wanted to be free as a stone!
Why did the Rolling Stones start a landscaping company? They wanted to rock ‘n’ roll all the lawns.
Why did the Rolling Stone start a gardening club? Because it wanted some rock and roll-lipops!
Why did the Rolling Stones bring a ladder to their concert? They wanted to rock and roll all night and party every day.
Why did the Rolling Stones go to the bakery? They heard they had great rock and roll!
What did one Rolling Stone say to the other when they couldn’t decide on a song to play? “Let’s rock-paper-scissors it out!”
Why did the Rolling Stones open a gym? Because they wanted everyone to get “Start Me Up” on the treadmill!
Why did the Rolling Stones become meteorologists? Because they wanted to predict when it’s going to be a “Paint It Black” kind of day!
Why did the Rolling Stone become a comedian? It wanted to make people laugh their rocks off!
How do the Rolling Stones prefer their eggs? Scrambled “Jumpin’ Jack” style!
Why did the Rolling Stones hire a gardener? Because they couldn’t get no “satisfaction” from their own weeds!
Why did Mick Jagger become a baker? Because he wanted to start rolling in dough in a different way!
Why did the Rolling Stones go to the grocery store? Because they couldn’t get no satisfaction from their tour bus snacks!
What do you call a rock band made up entirely of Rolling Stones impersonators? A “rolling” tribute band!
What is a Rolling Stone’s favorite game? Rock, paper, scissors.
Why did the Rolling Stone get kicked out of the library? It couldn’t keep its pages rolling.
How do the Rolling Stones party? They rock and roll all night, then sleep like a rock!
Why did the Rolling Stones become geologists? They were tired of rock ‘n’ roll and wanted to study rocks in a different way!
Why did the Rolling Stones start a gardening club? Because they wanted to “Get Off of My Herb!”
Why was the Rolling Stone always so calm? Because it had a lot of rock-solid experience!
Why did the Rolling Stone always bring a ladder to their concerts? Because they wanted to “climb” the charts!
What did the Rolling Stones say to the geologist? “Hey, we’ve got stones that really rock!”
What did the Rolling Stones say to their electrician? “We want some rockin’ watts!”
What’s Mick Jagger’s favorite type of rock? Rolling Stone, of course!
Why did the Rolling Stones hire a math tutor? Because they couldn’t always get no satisfaction.
What did the Rolling Stones say when their tour bus broke down? “Hey, we can’t always get transportation!”
Why did the Rolling Stone become a musician? It had great rhythm and it was always on a roll!
How do the Rolling Stones clean their clothes? They use rock and roll!
How does a Rolling Stone tell time? It watches the clock-rock!
Why did the Rolling Stones start a construction company? They wanted to build rock-solid buildings and roll with the punches!
Why did the Rolling Stones open a pet store? They wanted to sell rock pythons and rollie pollies!
What’s Mick Jagger’s favorite board game? Rolling Bones!
What did the Rolling Stones say to the geologist? “We’re the original rock stars!”
What’s the Rolling Stones’ favorite game to play at parties? “I Can’t Get No Charadesfaction!”
How do the Rolling Stones fix their broken instruments? With “rock” tape!
What is Mick Jagger’s favorite type of flooring? Rolling stone tiles.
Why did the Rolling Stones start a bakery? Because they couldn’t get no satisfaction from the bread they had before.
What do you call a stone that can sing like Mick Jagger? A rock star!
Why did the Rolling Stones become detectives? They wanted to solve the mystery of who painted it black!
What do the Rolling Stones do when they can’t decide on a restaurant? They “rock, paper, scissors” for it!
Why did the Rolling Stones always carry an umbrella? Because they couldn’t get no satisfaction from the weather!
Why did the Rolling Stone never get a job? It couldn’t find any satisfaction.
What did the Rolling Stone say to the geologist? “You rock, but I roll!”
What do you call it when Mick Jagger falls asleep during a concert? A rock ‘n’ nap!
Why did the Rolling Stones bring a ladder to the concert? Because they wanted to get a higher Rolling Stone.
How do the Rolling Stones like their coffee? Like their music, they like it strong and with plenty of grounds.
Why did the Rolling Stone go to the bakery? It wanted a little satisfaction loaf.
Why did the Rolling Stones open a pet store? They wanted to be the biggest rock reptile band in history.
Why did the Rolling Stones take up knitting? Because they wanted to rock some cozy sweaters on stage!
What do the Rolling Stones call their oldest fan? A rock dinosaur.
What do you get when you cross a Rolling Stone with a fitness guru? A rock-hard body and a rock-hard attitude.
Why did the Rolling Stones start a gardening club? Because they couldn’t get no satisfaction from their rock ‘n’ roll!
Why did Mick Jagger become a chef? Because he knew how to “Start Me Up” in the kitchen!
What do you call it when Mick Jagger finally settles down and stops performing? The Rolling Stones going on a rolling hiatus!
Why did the Rolling Stones become detectives? Because they wanted to solve the mystery of how to always stay Rolling Stone young!
Why did the Rolling Stones start a lawn care business? They wanted to have a “rolling” green lawn!
What’s Mick Jagger’s favorite game? “Rock, Paper, Scissors”!
What do you call a rock band that’s constantly moving? The Rolling Stones… and their tour bus!
Why did the Rolling Stones start a band instead of becoming archaeologists? Because they wanted to rock out with their Stone Age ancestors!
What did Mick Jagger say when he couldn’t find his car keys? “I can’t get no ignition.”
Why did the Rolling Stones become archaeologists? Because they wanted to find the oldest rocks in the world.
What do you call a Rolling Stone who can’t drive? A “Rock ‘n’ Roll-lercoaster”!
Why did Mick Jagger open a bakery? He wanted to roll with the dough!
How does a Rolling Stone do its laundry? It uses rock and roll detergent!
Why did the Rolling Stone refuse to play cards? They were afraid of a “rock” paper scissors match.
Why did the Rolling Stones become magicians? They wanted to make their careers “rock” with disappearing acts!

Short Rolling Stones Jokes

Short Rolling Stones jokes are like the band’s greatest hits—timeless, entertaining, and always in vogue.

These jokes are perfect for social media posts, texts, or when you need a quick laugh at a music-themed gathering.

The magic of short Rolling Stones jokes lies in their ability to be both lyrical and humorous, offering chuckles in a rock’n’roll style.

And now, ladies and gentlemen, with a drumroll please!

Here are short Rolling Stones jokes that will bring a rock star laughter in just a few words.

What’s the Rolling Stones’ favorite kind of bread? Rolling in the dough!
How do the Rolling Stones stay fit? They keep on rolling!
How do Rolling Stones communicate? They rock the microphone!
What do Rolling Stones use to fix their car? Rock-n-roll tape!
What’s a Rolling Stone’s favorite dessert? Rock ‘n’ roll-lercoaster!
How do Rolling Stones get around? They roll on the highway!
Why did the Rolling Stone become a baker? He loved rolling scones!
What’s a Rolling Stone’s favorite type of music? “Rock” and roll, naturally!
What’s Mick Jagger’s favorite type of workout? Jumpin’ Jacks!
How does Mick Jagger like his toast? Rolling, rolling, rolling!
What’s a Rolling Stone’s favorite vegetable? Mick Jagger-tomato!
What do the Rolling Stones use to clean their windows? Mick Windex!
What’s a Rolling Stone’s favorite car? A “Rolls” Royce, of course!
What’s a Rolling Stone’s favorite exercise? The rock ‘n’ roll-up!
What’s a Rolling Stone’s favorite movie genre? “Rockumentaries”!
Why did the Rolling Stones become geologists? They love studying rock formations!
What do you call a Rolling Stone with no teeth? Mick Gummy!
What’s Mick Jagger’s favorite kind of bread? Brown Sugar Loaf!
How do the Rolling Stones clean their kitchen? They “paint it black!”
What’s the Rolling Stones’ favorite snack? Rock and Roll-itos!

Rolling Stones Jokes One-Liners

Rolling Stones one-liner jokes are the embodiment of wit and humor, compressed into a single, sharp sentence.

Just like the iconic band’s hits, these one-liners strike a chord, hitting the perfect blend of humor, surprise, and cleverness.

Creating a good one-liner is no different from crafting a classic rock song; it requires inspiration, precision, and a deep understanding of the rhythm of language.

The real magic lies in managing to fit the set-up and punchline into a single line, delivering a powerful comedic punch with the fewest words possible.

So, get ready to rock and roll with laughter with these Rolling Stones one-liners:

Why did the Rolling Stones decide to become chefs? They couldn’t get no bread but they were still rolling in dough.
Why did the Rolling Stone become a weatherman? It had a knack for forecasting rock slides.
I asked Keith Richards if he believes in ghosts. He said, “I’m not sure, but I’ve seen a few deadheads in my time!”
What do you call a Rolling Stone that gets stuck in traffic? Rock ‘n’ roll congestion.
Why don’t Rolling Stones ever play hide and seek? Because they can’t always get what they want.
How do Rolling Stones stay in shape? They rock out at the gym!
Why did the Rolling Stones become chefs? Because they wanted to serve “Brown Sugar” cookies!
What do you call a stone that can sing and dance? A Rolling Stone!
Why did the Rolling Stone hire a personal trainer? He wanted to become a rock-solid icon.
Why do Rolling Stones make terrible librarians? They can’t get no satisfaction from keeping things quiet!
What did the Rolling Stone say to the annoying pebble? Can’t you see I’m on a roll here?
What did the Rolling Stones say when they couldn’t decide which pizza to order? “I can’t get no crustisfaction.”
What do you call a rock band that is always on time? The Rolling Clocks!
Why did the Rolling Stone go to therapy? It wanted to learn how to stop gathering moss.
Why did the Rolling Stones start a landscaping business? They wanted to rock and rake the world!
Why did the Rolling Stone join a yoga class? To get a little more satisfaction from his moves!
What’s Keith Richards’ favorite type of bread? Rolling “stones” sourdough.
Why did the Rolling Stones start a bakery? Because they wanted to make rock ‘n’ roll cakes that would never crumble!
How do the Rolling Stones decide who gets the last slice of pizza? They rock-paper-scissors it out!
Why did the Rolling Stone become an author? Because they wanted to write their own “rock” autobiography!
Why did the Rolling Stone become a gardener? Because he wanted to rock and roll and grow roses.
Why did the Rolling Stones become bakers? Because they couldn’t get no satisfaction from just singing “Brown Sugar!”
What do you call a Rolling Stone who can’t remember anything? A forgetful rockstar!
What do you call it when the Rolling Stones try their hand at cooking? Rock and roll-overs!
What did the Rolling Stones say when they saw a big boulder? “Hey, that’s just our little cousin!”
What do you call a Rolling Stone that can’t sit still? A rest-lesser.
I asked a Rolling Stone if it wanted to go on a trip, it replied, “I can’t get no vacation!”
Why did the Rolling Stone take a cooking class? He wanted to learn how to make the best rolling scones!
What did the Rolling Stone say to the musician? “You may have talent, but I have rock and roll in my veins!”
How do the Rolling Stones organize their music? They use the Rolling Catalog Stones!
Why don’t the Rolling Stones ever get lost? Because they always have a “Street Fighting Man” to give them directions!
What do you call a Rolling Stone that’s constantly changing directions? A rolling conundrum.
Why did the Rolling Stone become a weatherman? He wanted to predict rockslides and rolling thunderstorms.
What do the Rolling Stones say when they see a really big rock? “I can’t get no (satisfaction), but that rock can!”
What did the Rolling Stone say when he saw a hill? I can’t get no elevation!
Why did the Rolling Stones become archaeologists? Because they couldn’t get no satisfaction without digging up old bones!
What did the Rolling Stone say when it got stuck in a crack? I’m between a rock and a hard place!
What did the Rolling Stones say when they got locked out of their hotel room? “Hey! You can’t always get innuendo.”
Why did the Rolling Stones become fashion designers? They wanted to start a trend and get rolling in style.
Why did the Rolling Stone go to art school? Because they wanted to become a “Rock”star!
What do you call a rock that’s a big fan of the Rolling Stones? Mick Schist.
Why did the Rolling Stone never become a chef? It couldn’t get no spice in its life.
What do you call a Rolling Stone that can’t stop moving? A “rock” and “roll” poltergeist!
Why did the Rolling Stones join a gym? They wanted to stay in rock-solid shape!
Why did the Rolling Stone refuse to join a band? He didn’t want to get stoned with the wrong crowd.
I heard the Rolling Stones are starting a gardening club, their favorite plant is Mick Jagger-nip!
Why did the Rolling Stones go to the dentist? To get some Mick and dental fillings!
I asked the Rolling Stones if they knew any good jokes, and they said, “Yeah, we’re a laugh riot. We’ve got a ton of rolling stone puns.” They couldn’t always get humor, but they tried sometimes.
What did the Rolling Stones say when they realized they were lost? “I can’t get no direction!”
What do you call a stone that’s really clumsy? A “rolling” stone that trips a lot.
Why did the Rolling Stones become archaeologists? Because they couldn’t get no (satisfaction) from history books!
What do you call a Rolling Stone that’s great at math? A “Rock”culus!
What do the Rolling Stones say when they’re asked about their gardening skills? “We can’t always get plants we want!”
I asked a Rolling Stone if it was happy, it said, “I can’t get no elation!”
What do the Rolling Stones say when they’re trying to park their car? “Hey, you, get off of my cloud parking spot!”
Why did the Rolling Stone join a gym? Because they wanted to stay “rock” solid!
What did the Rolling Stone say when he couldn’t find his guitar pick? I’m in a hard place!
Why did the Rolling Stone start a bakery? He wanted to make rock-hard bread rolls.
Why did the Rolling Stones become motivational speakers? Because they wanted to encourage people to “Start Me Up” and achieve their dreams!
Why did the Rolling Stone go to the dentist? He wanted a little satisfaction for his toothache.
Why did the Rolling Stone become an actor? Because he wanted to rock the silver screen!
What did the Rolling Stone say to the drum set? “You’re my favorite rock and roller coaster!”
What do the Rolling Stones use to clean their instruments? Rock and soap!
Why did the Rolling Stone go to therapy? It had too many emotional rocks to roll!
I saw a Rolling Stone trying to dance, it definitely had no moves like Jagger.
Why was the Rolling Stone always broke? He couldn’t always get no financial satisfaction!
What did the Rolling Stone say to his bandmates before a performance? “Let’s rock and roll all night… and party every day!”
Why did the Rolling Stone refuse to visit the dentist? It didn’t want to get any stones extracted.
Why did the Rolling Stone go on a diet? He wanted to lose a few stones!
Why did the Rolling Stone start a band? It wanted to get stoned and roll with the music!
Why did the Rolling Stones always have perfect hair? Because they always “rock” the right style.
Why did the Rolling Stones become hairdressers? Because they couldn’t always get a good haircut, but if they tried sometimes, they just might find they get bangs.
What did the Rolling Stone say when he found a penny? Hey, you, get off my cloud!
Why did the Rolling Stone join a gym? To get a little “rock” hard body!
Why don’t Rolling Stones ever become bakers? They can’t always get what they knead!
What’s a Rolling Stones’ favorite camping activity? Rolling rock around the campfire!
What do you call a Rolling Stone that doesn’t gather moss? A “Rock”et!
Why did the Rolling Stone become a comedian? He wanted to roll with laughter wherever he went!
How does a Rolling Stone start a conversation? By saying, “Hey, I’m rolling with the stones.” .
Why did the Rolling Stone bring a ladder to the concert? He wanted to get a better “satisfaction” of the high notes!
What do the Rolling Stones call their favorite math equation? “You can’t always get the sum you want!”
What do you call a Rolling Stone that gets lost? A lost Rolling Zone.
Why did the Rolling Stone never have a pet? Because he couldn’t handle the rock and roll lifestyle with a leash!
Why was the Rolling Stone always hot? Because they were always on fire with their music.
What did the Rolling Stone say to the clumsy rock? You really need to get rolling in the right direction.
Why did the Rolling Stone get a job at a construction site? Because they wanted to lay down some “rock” solid foundations!
Why did the Rolling Stone get a job as a painter? He wanted to add a touch of rock and roll to every canvas.
What’s the Rolling Stones’ favorite type of pizza? Rolling in the deep dish.
Why did the Rolling Stones become bakers? Because they wanted to make “Start Me Up” buns!
How do Rolling Stones like their coffee? Brown sugar and a little bit of rock and roll!
Why did the Rolling Stone quit its job as a gardener? It got tired of being stoned all the time.
Why did the Rolling Stone join a gym? They wanted to keep rocking and rolling for years to come.
What do you call a Rolling Stone that’s always late? Mick Jagged Time.
What do you call a Rolling Stone who can cook? A rolling scone!
Why did the Rolling Stone become a geologist? Because they loved studying “rock” and “roll”!
How do the Rolling Stones stay organized? They keep their music in rock-solid folders.
What did the Rolling Stones say when someone asked them about their favorite type of flooring? “I can’t get no (satisfaction) with carpet!”
Why did the Rolling Stone become a musician? It couldn’t resist the urge to rock and roll!
Why did the Rolling Stones start a gardening club? They wanted to grow rockin’ flowers and roll with nature!
What do Rolling Stones use to pay for things? Rock and rollar credit cards.
Why did the Rolling Stone start a band? Because he couldn’t be a boulder.
What is a Rolling Stone’s favorite exercise? Rock climbing, obviously.
Why did the Rolling Stone refuse to play chess? They thought it was too “stone-cold” of a game.
Why did the Rolling Stone go on a diet? They wanted to be a “rock” and “roll” model!
Why did the Rolling Stone join a gardening club? He wanted to grow his own rock garden!
What do you call it when the Rolling Stones throw a party? Rock and roll-ing out the red carpet!
Why did the Rolling Stones become geologists? They wanted to rock around the clock and study rolling stones!
Why did the Rolling Stone bring a ladder to the concert? Because he wanted to be a high roller!
Why did the Rolling Stone fail as a comedian? It couldn’t stop cracking up.
Why did the Rolling Stone start a band? Because he couldn’t get no satisfaction as a pebble!
What do the Rolling Stones call their security guards? Rocks ‘n’ Roll!
Why did the Rolling Stones go to the dentist? Because they needed some Mick Jaggered teeth!
What’s Mick Jagger’s favorite type of coffee? “Start me up, latte!”
What do you call a Rolling Stone that can’t get up? Mick Jagger after a concert.
What’s Mick Jagger’s favorite type of bagel? Rolling “stones” bagels.
How do the Rolling Stones keep their teeth healthy? They use Mick-turine toothpaste!
How do Rolling Stones celebrate their birthdays? They rock and roll all night long!
What do you call a Rolling Stone that stays in one place? A pebble!
How does a Rolling Stone stay cool in the summer? They “rock” an ice cream cone!
Why did the Rolling Stone start a fashion line? He wanted to rock the runway with his style!
What do the Rolling Stones say when they make a mistake? “Oops, I guess I can’t always get what I want.”
Why was the Rolling Stone always invited to parties? Because it knew how to “rock” the dance floor!
What did the Rolling Stones say when they discovered they had a flat tire? “Hey, Mick, I guess we can’t always get a spare!”
Why did the Rolling Stone always have great hair? Because it was always rocking a fabulous mane!
What do you call a Rolling Stone without any rhythm? A Mick Jagger on vacation!
I told Mick Jagger that I wanted to be a rockstar, and he said, “You can’t always get what you want.” So, I became a mime instead.
What did the Rolling Stone say to the geologist? “I rock harder than any mineral!”
Why did the Rolling Stone become a magician? Because they wanted to make rock and roll disappear… and then bring it back with a bang.
What’s the Rolling Stones’ favorite type of exercise? Jumpin’ Jack Flashmob!
Why did the Rolling Stones become weather forecasters? Because they can’t get no precipitation!
Why did the Rolling Stone break up with their significant other? They couldn’t handle the rock and roll lifestyle, it was too rolling for them.
What did the Rolling Stone say when he stumbled? “Oops, I guess I’m rolling with the stones!”
Why don’t the Rolling Stones like gardening? Because they can’t get no satisfaction from growing roses.
Why did the Rolling Stones start a gardening club? Because they can’t always get what they want, but if they try sometimes, they just might find they get rhubarb.
Why did the Rolling Stone become a weather forecaster? Because they love predicting rain, shine, or paint it black.
Why did the Rolling Stone start a gym? Because he wanted to help people get their rocks off.
What did the Rolling Stone say to the gossip magazine? I’m a rock, not a boulder of misinformation.
How do the Rolling Stones count their money? One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, sixteen, seventeen, eighteen, nineteen, twenty, twenty-one, twenty-two, twenty-three, twenty-four, twenty-five, twenty-six, twenty-seven, twenty-eight, twenty-nine, thirty… Paint it black!
Why did the Rolling Stones open a bakery? Because you can’t always get scones you want.
What did the Rolling Stone say to the pebble? “Hey, you’re not a rock ‘n’ roll star!”
What did the Rolling Stone say when he got a flat tire? “I can’t always get inflated!”
What did the Rolling Stone say to the sandpaper? “You’re a little too rough for my taste!”
I saw Mick Jagger at the gym, but he was just doing the shuffle instead of working out.
Why did the Rolling Stones get kicked out of the library? They couldn’t stop mumbling “I can’t get no… shh!”
What is the Rolling Stones’ favorite type of pizza? Rolling in the deep-dish!

Rolling Stones Dad Jokes

Rolling Stones dad jokes are the ideal combination of music trivia, classic humor, and a dash of cheekiness that can make anyone chuckle and roll their eyes simultaneously.

They’re the type of jokes that are so cheesy, they rock.

Perfect for parties, road trips, or simply to lighten the mood, these jokes are the ultimate ice-breakers.

Get ready to rock and roll with laughter.

Here are some Rolling Stones dad jokes that are bound to get your giggle gears rolling:

What did the Rolling Stones say when they couldn’t find their tour bus? “Hey, you, get off of my cloud!”
Why did the Rolling Stones hire a geologist for their tour? They wanted to make sure their stage was always rock-solid.
What do you call a Rolling Stone with a good memory? A rock-elector!
Why did the Rolling Stones become geologists? Because they love studying rocks that roll!
What’s Mick Jagger’s favorite dessert? Brown Sugar Pie!
What do you call a Rolling Stone that’s been sitting too long? A moss-enger!
Why are Rolling Stones terrible chefs? Because they can’t make anything without a little rock and roll!
Why do Rolling Stones love puzzles? Because they’re always ready to “get puzzled”!
Why did the Rolling Stone take up knitting? Because it wanted to be “rock” and wool.
Why did the Rolling Stones start a clothing line? Because they wanted to give people the satisfaction of dressing like a rock star!
What do you call it when Mick Jagger sits on a fence? Jumpin’ Jack Flash!
How do the Rolling Stones stay in shape? They keep rockin’ and rollin’ every day!
Why did the Rolling Stones stop playing baseball? Because Mick Jagger couldn’t get no satisfaction from the pitcher!
What did the Rolling Stones say when they found a great parking spot? “It’s just a Rolling Stone’s throw away!”
What do the Rolling Stones call their favorite action movie? “Roll Hard”!
Why did the Rolling Stones become chefs? Because they wanted to add some rock and roll flavor to every dish!
How do you know if a Rolling Stone is happy? It keeps on rolling.
Why did the Rolling Stones bring a ladder to their concert? Because they wanted to reach new heights of rock and roll!
Why did the Rolling Stone go to the doctor? Because it had a case of the rock and rolls!
Why did the Rolling Stone go camping? Because they wanted to “rock” the great outdoors!
What did the Rolling Stones say when they found a lost rock? “Paint it back, paint it back, paint it back!”
Why did the Rolling Stone become a chef? It wanted to create the most “rockin'” recipes in the kitchen.
How do the Rolling Stones stay healthy? They always get their daily dose of rock and roll!
Why did the Rolling Stones hire a gardener? Because they needed someone to help them rock out with their hedges out!
Why did the Rolling Stone start a workout routine? Because they wanted to “rock” a fit body!
Why did the Rolling Stones open a pet store? Because they wanted to sell rockin’ rollin’ pets!
What do you call a rock band that’s always on a roll? The Rolling Stones!
Why did the Rolling Stones cancel their outdoor concert? They heard it was going to be a little too rocky.
Why did Mick Jagger bring a pencil to the concert? In case he wanted to “start me up”!
Why did the Rolling Stones become magicians? Because they wanted to make their fans say, “I can’t get no satisfaction… from figuring out their tricks!”
What do Rolling Stones use to stay organized? A rock-solid schedule!
Why are the Rolling Stones always so calm? Because they’re ‘rock’ steady!
Why did the Rolling Stones become financial advisors? Because they know how to make a rock-solid investment!
What did the Rolling Stones say when they saw a painting? That artwork really rocks!
What do you call a Rolling Stone that never stops moving? A rock ‘n’ rollercoaster.
Why did the Rolling Stone go on a diet? It wanted to be a “rolling” stone, not a “rolling” boulder.
Why was the Rolling Stone such a great athlete? They always gave it their ‘rock’ best!
How do Rolling Stones like their coffee? “Rock” hard and strong.
Why did the Rolling Stones join the circus? They wanted to be rock stars under the big top.
What do the Rolling Stones and a fine wine have in common? They both get better with age, and they both leave a lasting impression on your lips.
Why did the Rolling Stone start a garden? It wanted to grow some rockin’ radishes!
How do Rolling Stones communicate? They send “rock”-ing messages.
What did the Rolling Stone say to the drummer? Hey man, you really rock my world!
What do the Rolling Stones say before a meal? Let’s get rolling!
Why did the Rolling Stones become meteorologists? They were tired of just being rock stars; they wanted to predict the rock and roll weather!
Why did the Rolling Stones start a gardening club? Because they love “painting it black” with mulch!
Why did the Rolling Stones become weather forecasters? Because they are experts at predicting ‘rock’ showers and ‘roll’ing thunderstorms!
How do the Rolling Stones buy their groceries? They always ‘roll’ing through the aisles!
Why did the Rolling Stone refuse to play cards with the other rocks? Because it didn’t want to get caught up in the shuffle!
Why did the Rolling Stones join a bowling league? Because they were tired of just “rolling” on stage!
What do Rolling Stones say when they’re cold? “I’m feeling a bit un-“chilled.””
Why did the Rolling Stones go into the grocery store? They needed some “rock and roll” butter!
Why did the Rolling Stones start a construction company? Because they wanted to “rock” the building industry!
How do the Rolling Stones stay cool in the summer? They rock out in the shade of a big rolling stone!
Why did the Rolling Stone refuse to join the circus? It didn’t want to be a “rolling” stone in the ring.
Why don’t the Rolling Stones trust atoms? Because they make up everything, and the Stones can’t always get no satisfaction.
Why did the Rolling Stone become a chef? Because they love ‘rolling’ out the dough!
What do you call a Rolling Stone that’s lost its way? A lost “Gimme Shelter”!
Why did Mick Jagger join a gym? He wanted to keep rolling, rolling, rolling on the treadmill.
Why did the Rolling Stones take a nap? They needed some rock ‘n’ roll-rest.
Why did the Rolling Stones start a car washing business? Because they love to rock and rinse!
Why did the Rolling Stone become a weatherman? Because it wanted to predict the “rock”-n-roll weather.
Why did the Rolling Stones bring a ladder to the concert? In case they wanted to “jumping jack flash”!
What did the Rolling Stone say to their musician friend? “We should start a ‘rock’ band together!”
Why did the Rolling Stones join a bowling league? Because they love to ‘roll’ with the punches!
How do the Rolling Stones stay organized? They always keep a Rolling Calendar!
Why did the Rolling Stone become an artist? Because they wanted to ‘rock’ the art world!
What do the Rolling Stones call their favorite workout routine? Rolling in the deep!
Why did the Rolling Stone become a geologist? Because it wanted to rock out with some heavy minerals!
What’s the Rolling Stones’ favorite TV show? Rock of Ages!
What’s a Rolling Stone’s favorite way to stay cool in the summer? Rock and roll ice cream!
Why don’t the Rolling Stones ever visit the dentist? Because they love living with a little plaque on their teeth!
What did the Rolling Stone say to the paper? I get a lot of satisfaction from you!
What do you call a Rolling Stone that’s stuck between two boulders? Immobile Jagger!
Why did the Rolling Stones start a construction company? Because they wanted to lay down some solid foundations!
What did the Rolling Stones say when they stubbed their toe? “Paint it, black!”
Why did the Rolling Stones start a coffee shop? Because they love to ‘roll’ out of bed and brew some fresh java!
What do the Rolling Stones call their favorite board game? ‘Rolling’opoly!
Why did the Rolling Stones go to the bakery? Because they wanted some “brown sugar” doughnuts!
What did the Rolling Stones say when they found a hidden treasure? We can’t always get what we want, but sometimes we get rock and gems!
How do the Rolling Stones handle rough patches in their relationships? They roll with it!
What do the Rolling Stones use to communicate with each other? Rolling Stone-age technology!
Why did the Rolling Stone start a gardening business? Because they had a ‘rockin’ green thumb!’.
Why did the Rolling Stones become chefs? Because they wanted to ‘rock’ the kitchen and make some ‘satisfaction’ing meals!
What’s the Rolling Stones’ favorite game? Rolling the dice!
Why did the Rolling Stones become weather forecasters? Because they love to rock the airwaves!
What’s a Rolling Stone’s favorite meal? Rock ‘n’ roll and beans on toast!
Why did the Rolling Stone start a gardening business? It loved “rocking” the garden with beautiful stones.
Why did the Rolling Stones become weather forecasters? Because they wanted to predict “a rolling stone gathers no moss” storms!
Why do the Rolling Stones love playing hide and seek? Because they always find a Rolling Stone to hide behind!
Why did the Rolling Stones start a gardening club? Because they can’t always get ‘satisfaction’, but they can always get ‘saxifrage-tion’!
Why did the Rolling Stone start a fashion line? It wanted to design the most stylish “rock and roll” clothes.
How do the Rolling Stones take their coffee? Like a rolling scone!
Why did the Rolling Stones become chefs? Because they wanted to rock the kitchen with their famous “You Can’t Always Get What You Wanton” soup!
What’s the Rolling Stones’ favorite fruit? Rock ‘n’ roll-berries!
Why did the Rolling Stone become a geologist? He wanted to rock the world with his knowledge!
Why did the Rolling Stones become meteorologists? Because they love predicting rock ‘n’ roll storms!
Why did the Rolling Stone become a detective? Because they knew how to “rock” solving mysteries!
What did the Rolling Stone say when they couldn’t find their car keys? “I guess I’ve hit ‘rock’ bottom!”
What did the Rolling Stones say when they saw a smooth rock? “Hey, that’s one ‘tumbling dice’!”
Why did the Rolling Stones go to the dentist? Because they needed some tongue cleaning for all those rock ‘n’ roll lyrics!
Why did the Rolling Stones become magicians? Because they love making rocks disappear with their hit song “Abracadabra You’re Gone!”
What did the Rolling Stones say when they couldn’t find their way to the concert? We can’t get no satisfaction with these directions!
Why did the Rolling Stones become meteorologists? Because they love predicting “Paint It Black” clouds!
Why did the Rolling Stone bring a ladder to the concert? Because they wanted to “rock” out in the highest seat!
Why did the Rolling Stones start a fashion line? Because they wanted to show the world how to rock the perfect style!
Why did the Rolling Stone go to therapy? He had a lot of emotional baggage to unload!
Why did the Rolling Stone become a carpenter? Because it wanted to build a “rock”-solid foundation.
What did the Rolling Stone say to their fans? “I ‘rock’ and roll all night, and party every day!”
Why did the Rolling Stone become a geologist? It loved studying rocks and being a “rockstar” at the same time.
What did the Rolling Stones say when their favorite baseball team won the championship? “Hey, you can’t always get what you want, but sometimes you get a ‘pitcher’ perfect game!”
Why did the Rolling Stone get a job as a baker? It wanted to make some rockin’ rolls!
What did the Rolling Stones say when their tour bus broke down? “Hey, you, get off of my cloud…and help us fix this thing!”
Why do Rolling Stones like to garden? Because they have a “green thumb”!
How do the Rolling Stones stay cool during their concerts? They have fans everywhere!
What did the Rolling Stones say to the geologist? “Hey, can you tell us if this rock will roll?”
Why did the Rolling Stones open a pizza restaurant? Because they wanted to serve up some rock ‘n’ rollin’ dough.
How do the Rolling Stones keep their clothes wrinkle-free? They can’t always get what they iron!
Why did the Rolling Stone start a fitness routine? Because it wanted to “rock” a healthy lifestyle.
Why did the Rolling Stone go to school? Because it wanted to be a little more “rock-solid.”
Why did the Rolling Stones become weather forecasters? Because they wanted to bring some rock and roll thunder and lightning!
Why did the Rolling Stones become farmers? Because they wanted to grow some rock and roll-cabbage!
Why did the Rolling Stones form a band? Because they couldn’t resist the urge to rock and roll all night and party every day!
Why did the Rolling Stones go to the library? They were looking for some rock and roll books.
What’s Mick Jagger’s favorite board game? Rockopoly – where you can buy properties like “Gimme Shelter” and “Paint It Black.”
Why did the Rolling Stones start a construction company? Because they love working with rock solid materials!
Why did the Rolling Stones become interior decorators? Because they wanted to paint it black and make it rock!
What do you call it when Mick Jagger falls down the stairs? A rolling stone!
What do you call a Rolling Stone who loves puzzles? A rock ‘n’ roll crossword puzzler!
Why did the Rolling Stone become an architect? It wanted to design rock-solid buildings!
Why did the Rolling Stone refuse to join the soccer team? It didn’t want to get too “rolling” on the field.
What do you call a Rolling Stone that can play the guitar? Mick Jagguitar!
What did the Rolling Stones say when they played golf? Time is on my side, yes it is!
Why did the Rolling Stones become archaeologists? Because they wanted to uncover “rocks off” ancient civilizations!
What did the Rolling Stone say when asked about his favorite type of music? Rock ‘n’ roll, of course, it’s my only option!
Why did the Rolling Stones become teachers? Because they wanted to educate the world on rock and roll!
What do you call a Rolling Stone that’s too tired to move? A rock n’ rollin’ stone!
Why did the Rolling Stone start a band with a geologist? Because they both loved rock music!
How do the Rolling Stones like their coffee? With a whole lot of rock and roll cream and sugar!
What’s the Rolling Stones’ favorite mode of transportation? The Rock ‘n’ Roll-er coaster!
Why did the Rolling Stones become astronomers? Because they wanted to see the moonlight mile up close and personal!
What’s Mick Jagger’s favorite breakfast? Rolling Oats!
What do the Rolling Stones do when they have a flat tire? They ‘roll’ with it!
How do Rolling Stones stay cool in the summer? They always find shade under Mick Jagger’s lips!

Rolling Stones Jokes for Kids

Rolling Stones jokes for kids are the rock stars of the joke world—funny, lively, and sure to make your little ones giggle and smile.

These jokes help kids to appreciate humor in popular culture references, encouraging them to think outside the box and understand the power of puns and wordplay.

Moreover, Rolling Stones jokes for kids add a touch of music and rhythm to their laughter, making every joke a mini rock ‘n’ roll concert in their minds.

Ready to rock their laughter world?

Here are the jokes that will have them rolling with laughter just like the Rolling Stones:

Why did the Rolling Stone go to the bakery? To get a little “roll” in the dough!
What do you call a stone that listens to music? A rock and roll enthusiast!
Why did the Rolling Stones visit the bakery? Because they wanted to get some Rolling Scones!
Why don’t stones ever tell secrets? Because they always get stoned!
Why was the rock band so good at math? Because they knew all about “rock” and “roll”!
What do you call a rolling stone that’s also a musician? A rock star!
What did the rolling stone say to the microphone? Let’s make some rock ‘n’ roll noise!
What do you call a Rolling Stone that tells jokes? A rockstar comedian!
Why did the rock roll down the hill? Because it wanted to be a part of the Rolling Stones band!
Why did the rock band go to the dentist? Because they needed a little “rock” and “roll” filling!
What’s a Rolling Stone’s favorite bedtime story? The Rock and Roll Princess and the Rolling Stone!
What do you call a rock that plays guitar? A “rockstar”!
How did the rock get to the concert? It “rocked” and “rolled” all the way there!
Why did the rock climb the mountain? To reach the Rolling Stones concert at the top!
What do you get when you cross a rolling stone with a baseball player? A rock star pitcher!
What do you call a rock band that loves to exercise? The Rolling Groans!
Why don’t the Rolling Stones ever go swimming? Because they can’t get no satisfaction on dry land!
Why did the rolling stone stop rolling? It got “tired” of moving!
How does a Rolling Stone stay in shape? It does rock exercises!
Why did the Rolling Stone refuse to play basketball? It couldn’t handle the rock and roll!
Why did the Rolling Stones go to the beach? To catch some Rolling Waves!
How do the Rolling Stones pay their bills? With rock ‘n’ roll!
Why did the Rolling Stones go to the dentist? Because they wanted to rock and roll their teeth!
What did the Rolling Stones say when they bumped into each other? “I can’t get no satisfaction!”
What did the rock say to the geologist? I’m feeling a little “stoned” today!
What do you call a stone that sings all the time? A Rolling Stone, of course!
How do Rolling Stones stay healthy? They eat a lot of minerals and “rock” and roll!
Why did the rock never play hide-and-seek? Because it always got caught rolling away!
What did one rolling stone say to the other? Let’s keep rolling and rock the world like true Rolling Stones!
Why did the Rolling Stones never become chefs? Because they couldn’t roll out a decent recipe!
What do you call a stone that can roll uphill? A determined rolling stone!
Why did the Rolling Stones hire a chef? Because they wanted a rockin’ meal before their performance!
Why did the rock band break up? They couldn’t find a drummer who could “rock” and “roll”!
Why did the Rolling Stone join the circus? To learn how to juggle rocks and roll at the same time!
Why did the rolling stone take up gardening? It wanted to grow its own pebbles!
Why did the Rolling Stone go to school? To learn how to “rock ‘n’ roll” with the ABCs!
Why did the Rolling Stone start a band with a lemon? Because they wanted to make some rock and lemonade!
Why did the rock band hire a personal trainer? Because they wanted to be the fittest Rolling Stones!
How do you make a rolling stone laugh? Just tickle its funny bone!
Why did the Rolling Stones have a hard time driving? Because they couldn’t find their brakes – they were always on a roll!
How do you make a rolling stone stop rolling? Just yell “freeze”!
Why did the rolling stone cover itself in mud? Because it wanted to make a rock and mud pie!
Why did the Rolling Stones go to school? To rock the halls and roll the grades!
How do you make a rock band roll? Just push them down a hill!
What do you call a rolling stone that gathers no moss? A clean rock star!
Why did the rolling stone go to the beach? Because it wanted to make some sand-rolling castles!
What do you call a Rolling Stone that gets stuck? A rock and a hard place!
What do you call a rock band that never stops moving? The Rolling Stones, of course!
Why did the Rolling Stone go to the art gallery? Because it wanted to see some “rock” paintings!
Why did the Rolling Stone become a musician? It had a “rocking” talent!
Why did the Rolling Stones go to the bakery? Because they wanted some rock ‘n’ rolls for breakfast!
How do Rolling Stones send messages? They use rock and scroll!
How do Rolling Stones like to travel? They roll in style!
What did the Rolling Stones say when they couldn’t find their car keys? “Hey! You can’t always get what you want!”
What do you call a Rolling Stone that likes to swim? A rock lobster!
Why did the Rolling Stone go to the gym? It wanted to be in “rock” solid shape!
What did the rolling stone say to the sandpaper? You really know how to smooth things out!
What’s a rock band’s favorite exercise? Rolling Push-ups!
What do you call a Rolling Stone that’s always late? A rock that just rolls with it!
Why did the rock become a DJ? Because it wanted to roll with the Stones!
Why did the rock band break up? They couldn’t agree on their favorite Rolling Stone song!
Why did the Rolling Stone get a ticket? Because it was caught rolling too fast!
Why did the Rolling Stone never go on vacation? Because it was always on a roll!
Why did the rolling stone start a band? It wanted to be a rock star in every way!
What did one rock say to the other rock? “Let’s roll” on with the fun!”
What do you get when you cross a rock and a stone? A Rolling Stone that rocks your world!
Why did the rock band start rolling? Because they couldn’t stop rocking!
Why do rocks make great musicians? Because they can roll with the rhythm like true Rolling Stones!
What did the rock say to the Rolling Stones? “Let’s roll and rock this world together!”
Why are rolling stones so good at math? Because they never skip a rock!
Why did the rock never join a band? It didn’t want to be taken for granite!
How do rolling stones like their drinks? On the rocks!
How do Rolling Stones stay cool in the summer? They roll into a shade and enjoy the breeze!
What do you get when you cross a Rolling Stone with a snowman? Frosty Rhythm!
What did the Rolling Stone say to the garden rock? Hey, you rock ‘n’ roll!
What do you call a rock that’s always on the move? A Rolling Stone with a zest for adventure!
What did the rolling stone say to the cliff? I’ll see you at the rock and roll concert!
How do Rolling Stones stay cool? They always have great rock and roll fans to fan them!
Why did the Rolling Stone join a gym? Because it wanted to get “rolling” fit!
Why was the rolling stone so calm? It liked to go with the flow!
How do Rolling Stones listen to music? They rock out with their headphones on!
What did the rock say to the pencil? You’re “stone” cold!
Why did the Rolling Stone go to the dentist? It wanted to get a little “rock and roll”!
What did one rolling stone say to the other when they were tired? Let’s take a rock and roll nap!
Why did the Rolling Stone become a chef? Because they wanted to roll out some delicious food!
Why did the rock join a gym? It wanted to stay in shape for all that rolling like a Rolling Stone!
What’s a rock band’s favorite fruit? Rolling Stones!
Why did the rock band always bring their own lunch to concerts? Because they didn’t want to eat Rolling Scones!
What do you call a rock that never wants to move? A lazy Rolling Stone!
Why don’t rolling stones make good comedians? Because their jokes always fall flat!
Why did the Rolling Stones never become farmers? Because they couldn’t stop rocking and rolling!
What did the Rolling Stone say to the beach? “I’m ready to rock and roll!”
What do you call a stone that doesn’t want to roll? A lazy rock!
What did the rock say when it fell off the cliff? I can’t get no satisfaction!
What’s a rock’s favorite mode of transportation? Rolling on the road like a Rolling Stone!
What did the rock say to the volcano? “You’re a real “hot rock”!”
What did the rolling stone say to the beach? Let’s make some waves!
Why are the Rolling Stones always moving? Because they don’t want to be mistaken for sitting stones!
How do you make a rock laugh? Give it a little roll-tickle!
Why did the rock go to the party? It wanted to be the life of the rolling stone!
What’s a Rolling Stone’s favorite sport? Rolling bowling!
Why did the rock band go to school? Because they wanted to learn the Rolling Stones!
How does a rolling stone clean its kitchen? It uses a rock ‘n’ roll mop!
Why couldn’t the Rolling Stone play hide and seek? Because it always rocks!
What did the Rolling Stone say when it got tired? I need a rock and roll nap!
Why did the rolling stone go to the park? To rock ‘n’ roll on the swings!
Why did the rolling stone never get lost? Because it always knew which way to roll!
What do you call a rolling stone with a great sense of humor? A joketitioner!
Why did the rock wear sunglasses? Because it wanted to be as cool as a Rolling Stone!
Why did the rolling stone want to become a comedian? Because it wanted to make everyone roll with laughter!
How do the Rolling Stones pay for their groceries? With rock and roll quarters!
What did the rolling stone say to the river? Can I get a little rock ‘n’ roll?
What’s a Rolling Stone’s favorite type of weather? Rock ‘n’ rollin’ thunderstorms!
Why did the rock never make it as a musician? It couldn’t keep up with the Rolling Stones!

Rolling Stones Jokes for Adults

Can anyone resist a well-executed Rolling Stones joke?

Rolling Stones jokes for adults turn the humor up a notch, fusing a sharp wit with a dash of audacity.

Just like a timeless Rolling Stones track, these jokes blend elements of satire, intellect, and a sprinkle of brazenness for a laugh that is simply unforgettable.

These jokes are ideal for social gatherings, music festivals, or merely to add a touch of light-hearted banter during a serious discourse among fellow rock music aficionados.

Here are some Rolling Stones jokes that are perfectly tuned for adults:

Why did the Rolling Stones hire a geologist? They wanted to rock on solid ground!
Why did the Rolling Stone go on a diet? Because it couldn’t get no satisfaction from the food!
What did the Rolling Stones say when they couldn’t find the remote control? “I can’t get no digital action!”
Why do the Rolling Stones always carry an umbrella? In case it starts raining satisfaction!
Why did the Rolling Stone become a chef? Because it wanted to cook up some “Hot Stuff” in the kitchen!
How does Mick Jagger like his coffee? “Hot Stuff” and “Brown Sugar” sweet!
Why did the Rolling Stones go on a diet? Because they wanted to have a “rolling stone” body shape!
Why did the Rolling Stones open a bakery? Because they wanted to paint it black and roll some “Satisfaction” rolls!
Why did the Rolling Stones start a gardening club? They wanted to keep “painting it green” even in their free time!
Why did the Rolling Stones become meteorologists? Because they wanted to know if it was going to be a “Hot Rocks” day!
Why did the Rolling Stones bring their laundry to the concert? Because they heard they were performing a “rock and wash” show!
What do you call it when the Rolling Stones hire a personal trainer? A rock workout!
What’s Mick Jagger’s favorite type of exercise? Rock and roll-ups!
Why was Mick Jagger always late for band practice? He couldn’t get no “Satisfaction” with his alarm clock!
Why did Keith Richards refuse to join a bowling league? He didn’t want to roll anything other than Stones!
Why did the Rolling Stones hire a gardener? They needed someone to keep the grass rolling!
Why did the Rolling Stones become plumbers? They wanted to show that even rocks can roll in the pipes!
What do you call a rock star who can’t roll anymore? A Rolling Stone with arthritis!
Why did the Rolling Stones take up knitting? Because they wanted to rock and purl all night!
Why did the Rolling Stones stop by the bakery? They were looking for some “brown sugar!”
Why did the Rolling Stones hire an archaeologist? Because they wanted to rock the Stone Age!
Why did the Rolling Stones go to the dentist? Because they wanted a little bit of “Satisfaction” with their pearly whites!
Why did Keith Richards become a chef? He wanted to “get some satisfaction” in the kitchen!
What’s the favorite dessert of the Rolling Stones? Sticky Fingers!
Why did the Rolling Stones visit the dentist? They needed a little bit of “Gimme Tooth Decay!”
What do you call a Rolling Stone that can’t remember their own songs? A stuck record!
Why do the Rolling Stones never get lost? Because they always follow the ‘Street Fighting Man’!
What do the Rolling Stones say when they hit a wrong note? “Oops, I guess that’s how they roll!”
What did Mick Jagger say when he accidentally bumped into a wall? “Hey, you can’t always get wall you want!”
Why did Mick Jagger go to the dentist? He wanted to get some satisfaction from his toothache!
Why did the Rolling Stones become obsessed with geology? They wanted to know if it’s possible to rock and roll all night and lithify every day!
What’s a Rolling Stone’s favorite kind of pizza? One with extra “rock” sauce!
What do you call a rock that rolls all night? A Rolling Stone concert!
Why did the Rolling Stones never get lost? Because they always had a good sense of “direction”!
Why did the Rolling Stones cover themselves in flour? Because they wanted to be a little bit “rock and roll!”
How do the Rolling Stones start their day? With a little “start me up” coffee!
Why did Mick Jagger open a clothing store? Because he wanted to give his fans “Satisfaction” with the latest fashion trends!
How do Rolling Stones get their groceries? They roll them home in a cart!
Why did the Rolling Stones hire a mathematician? To count all their wrinkles!
Why did the Rolling Stones become geologists? Because they had a rock-solid passion for stones!
Why did the Rolling Stones break up? Mick Jagger finally found satisfaction!
Why did Mick Jagger become a gardener? He wanted to plant some “wildflowers” in his garden!
Why did the Rolling Stone start a gardening business? Because it wanted to grow some “Wild Horses” in the backyard!
Why did the Rolling Stones start gardening? They wanted some rock and roll-ardens!
Why did the Rolling Stones start making their own line of ice cream? Because they wanted to give fans a taste of “Exile on Ice Cream”!
What do you call it when the Rolling Stones retire and open a pizza joint? The Rolling Dough-stones!
What do the Rolling Stones eat for breakfast? Sticky Fingers!
What’s the Rolling Stones’ favorite dessert? Rock and “Roll” ice cream sundaes!
Why did the Rolling Stones start a gardening club? They wanted to have some rockin’ flower beds!
What do the Rolling Stones say when they go to the club? Gimme Shelter!
How do the Rolling Stones count their money? One “satisfaction” at a time!
Why did the Rolling Stones open a pasta restaurant? Because they couldn’t get no (lasagna) satisfaction!
What did Keith Richards say to a rock that was blocking his way? “Hey, I’m a Rolling Stone, not you!”
Why did the Rolling Stones refuse to play at the bakery? Because they didn’t want to be “Rolling Scones”!
Why did the Rolling Stones become beekeepers? They wanted to “get a little honey from their hive!”
What did the Rolling Stones say when they walked into a bookstore? “Hey, you! Get off of my cloud!” because they wanted to read in peace!
Why did Mick Jagger start carrying around a ladder? He wanted to reach new highs!
What do you call a Rolling Stones concert that’s held in a library? The “Silent Stones”!
How does Mick Jagger keep his energy up during concerts? He has a constant supply of Rolling Scones!
What do you call it when a Rolling Stone song plays on a broken record player? Satisfaction guaranteed!
What did Mick Jagger say to his dentist? “Please give me a tooth that is ‘loose’ but ‘tight’!”
Why don’t the Rolling Stones ever play hide and seek? Because no matter where they go, they can’t get no satisfaction!
How do the Rolling Stones fix a broken guitar string? They give it a Keith Richards!
Why did Keith Richards bring a ladder to the Rolling Stones concert? Because he wanted to be the ultimate “rock” and “roll” star!
What do you call a Rolling Stone who can’t find his guitar? Homeless!
Why did the Rolling Stones join a gym? So they could do the Mick Jagger workout: “Start me up, keep me up, and let me rock and roll!”
What’s the Rolling Stones’ favorite kind of pizza? Sticky Fingers and Extra Tongue!
Why did the Rolling Stones cancel their gig? Mick Jagger couldn’t get no satisfaction from the sound system!
What do the Rolling Stones call a successful concert? A rock-solid performance!
What did the Rolling Stones say when they saw a boulder in their way? “Hey, we can’t get no “rock and roll!”
What do you call a Rolling Stone who starts a fitness program? A “gym and tonic!”
What do you call a Rolling Stone that’s always covered in dirt? A rock ‘n’ roller coaster!
What did Mick Jagger say to the rock that wouldn’t roll? “You can’t always get what you want!”
Why did the Rolling Stones become archeologists? They wanted to keep rockin’ even in the Stone Age!
What did the Rolling Stones say to their aging drummer? Time may be on your side, but arthritis isn’t!
Why did Mick Jagger start a gardening hobby? He wanted to be a rock ‘n’ roll onion!
Why did Keith Richards bring a ladder to the concert? Because he wanted to reach new highs!
What did Mick Jagger say when he saw a tiny pebble rolling down the hill? “I can’t get no satisfaction from that little rock!”
Why did the Rolling Stones attend a cooking class? They wanted to learn how to rock ‘n’ roll some tasty recipes!
What did the Rolling Stones say when they received their electricity bill? “Wow, that’s a shocking amount of power to rock and roll!”
Why did the Rolling Stones open a bakery? They wanted to roll more than just music!
What’s the Rolling Stones’ favorite Mexican dish? “You Can’t Always Get Guacamole!”
Why did Mick Jagger get a job at the bakery? Because he wanted to be a rolling scone!
Why did Mick Jagger start a bakery? Because he couldn’t always get satisfaction from just being a rock star!
What did the Rolling Stone say when he fell down the stairs? “I can’t get no traction!”
What do you call a Rolling Stone who loves math? A rockstar-ithmetician!
What do you call a Rolling Stone that breaks? A Mick Jaggered rock!
Why don’t the Rolling Stones play hide and seek? Because they can’t get no satisfaction in finding a good hiding spot!
Why did Mick Jagger become a fitness instructor? Because he couldn’t always get what he wanted, but he could always get some exercise!
Why did the Rolling Stones open a bakery? They wanted to be rock ‘n’ rollin’ in the dough!
What do you call a Rolling Stone that’s afraid of heights? A rock-bottom phobic!
Why did the Rolling Stones open a gym? To get some rock-hard abs and keep on rolling!
What do you call it when a Rolling Stone guitarist loses his balance? A Keith Richards tumble!
Why don’t the Rolling Stones like gardening? Because they can’t always get what they weed!
Why did the Rolling Stones bring their own detergent to the laundromat? Because they couldn’t get no satisfaction with someone else washing their clothes!
What did Mick Jagger say when he found out he was a distant relative of a geologist? “I can’t get no sedimentation!”
What’s Mick Jagger’s favorite exercise? Rock climbing!
Why did Mick Jagger open a bakery? Because he couldn’t get no satisfaction from the music industry!
Why do Rolling Stones make great comedians? They have the best one-liners!
What did the Rolling Stone say to the annoying fan? “Hey, you! Get off of my cloud!”
How do the Rolling Stones stay in shape? They rock ‘n’ roll their way through every workout!
What’s Mick Jagger’s favorite type of exercise? “Jumping Jack Flash”!
Why did the Rolling Stones always carry a map? So they could “paint it black” when they found new concert venues!
Why did the Rolling Stone go to the dentist? It had a bad case of Mick Jagger!
What do you call a Rolling Stone who can’t remember their lyrics? A “Rock ‘n’ Amnesia” case!
Why did Mick Jagger become a geologist? Because he wanted to be a “Rock” star in every sense of the word!
What’s the Rolling Stones’ favorite game to play at parties? Rock, Paper, Scissors, Lizard, Spock!
Why did Mick Jagger go to the tailor? To get some “satisfaction” with his new suit!
What’s Mick Jagger’s favorite type of pizza? Satisfaction Margherita!
What do you call a Rolling Stone with a broken leg? A rock bandage!
What did Mick Jagger say when he lost his luggage? “I can’t get no satisfaction!”
What did Mick Jagger say when he couldn’t find the bathroom at the concert? “I can’t get no urination!”
What’s the Rolling Stones’ favorite type of music to listen to in the garden? Rock and soil!
What did the Rolling Stones say when their tour bus broke down? “Time is on my side, yes it is… to wait for the mechanic!”
Why did the Rolling Stone become a dentist? Because it wanted to give people some “Satisfaction” with their smiles!
What do the Rolling Stones say when they can’t find their favorite record? “I can’t get no vinyl satisfaction!”
What did Mick Jagger say when he accidentally stepped on a bug? “I can’t get no, bug satisfaction!”
Why did the Rolling Stones start a garden? They wanted to get some “Satisfaction” from watching the grass grow!
Why don’t the Rolling Stones like going to haunted houses? They’re afraid they’ll get some Rolling Scones!
What do you call it when a Rolling Stone breaks a bone? A rock fracture!
What’s the Rolling Stones’ favorite type of exercise? “Rock” climbing, of course!
What did the Rolling Stones guitarist say to the clumsy pianist? “You’re not rolling the keys like a true Stone!”
What did Mick Jagger say to his wife when she asked if he was going to take out the trash? “I can’t always get rid of what I want, but I want to be your trash man!”
Why did Mick Jagger start a gardening business? Because he couldn’t get no satisfaction from being a rockstar!
Why did the Rolling Stones buy a treadmill? They wanted to get their rocks off and stay fit!
What’s Mick Jagger’s favorite thing to do at a bowling alley? “Roll” the Stones down the lane!
Why did the Rolling Stones become painters? They wanted to rock the art world with their brushstrokes!
What did the Rolling Stones say when they finally found a comfortable chair? “Finally, we can rock and rest at the same time!”
What do you get when you cross a Rolling Stone with a mathematician? A rock ‘n’ roll logarithm!
Why do the Rolling Stones love to garden? Because they believe in rock and roll-ing in the grass!
What’s Mick Jagger’s favorite type of pizza? Satisfaction, because he can’t get no crustisfaction!
Why did the Rolling Stone start a bakery? Because it wanted to bake a “Brown Sugar” cake!
How do the Rolling Stones stay in shape? They do lots of “rock and roll” ups!
What’s Mick Jagger’s favorite dessert? Start Me Up-cake!
What do you call it when Mick Jagger walks into a bakery? Rolling scones!
What did Mick Jagger say to his dentist? “You can’t always get what you want, but I want my teeth whitened!”
Why did the Rolling Stones open a bakery? Because they wanted to have ‘Brown Sugar’ every day!
What did the Rolling Stones say to the geologist? “You can’t always get the schist you want!”
Why did the Rolling Stones become chefs? They wanted to “Rolling Scones” and make rock ‘n’ roll cakes!
What do you call a Rolling Stone that’s always late? A “rock” that needs to set its alarm!
Why did the Rolling Stones start a gardening club? They wanted to have a little weed on their side!
What’s Keith Richards’ favorite type of flooring? Rock and Roll Carpets!
What’s Mick Jagger’s favorite type of flooring? Vinyl!
What did the Rolling Stone say to the other stone rolling down the hill? “Hey, let’s rock and roll!”
Why are the Rolling Stones so good at playing hide and seek? Because they’re experts at “rock” and roll!
Why did the Rolling Stones become dentists? Because they wanted to help people get a “rolling smile”!
Why did the Rolling Stones become scientists? Because they wanted to rock and roll with the laws of physics!
What did the Rolling Stones say when they accidentally stumbled upon a hidden treasure? “Look at this, we’ve found the Rolling “Stones” of gold!”
Why did the Rolling Stones become archaeologists? Because they wanted to rock out with their fossils out!
Why did the Rolling Stones become chefs? They love to “Start Me Up” with some good food!
What’s Mick Jagger’s favorite type of exercise? Rolling in the deep!
What do you call it when Mick Jagger opens a seafood restaurant? The Rolling Stones Crab Shack!
Why did the Rolling Stones go to the dentist? To get some “tongue” in cheek!
What did Mick Jagger say when his friend asked if he could join the Rolling Stones? “You can’t always get what you want!”
Why did the Rolling Stones start a construction company? Because they always wanted to be known for their “Rock” solid foundations!
How do the Rolling Stones keep their music so timeless? They never take it for granite!
Why did the Rolling Stone get a job at a bakery? It wanted to be a bread-rolling stone!
What do you call it when the Rolling Stones become pirates? The Rolling “Stones” on the high seas!
Why did the Rolling Stone refuse to play cards? It didn’t want to lose its “rock” status!
Why do the Rolling Stones still tour after all these years? They’re just trying to get their rocks off!
Why did the Rolling Stone start a gardening business? It loved to rock and mulch!
Why did the Rolling Stones cancel their outdoor concert? They were worried about the Rolling Weeds stealing the show!
How do the Rolling Stones stay in shape? They rock and roll all night and party every day!
What do you call a Rolling Stone who can’t find its way home? A lost “rock” star!
Why did the Rolling Stones become painters? Because they wanted to give a ‘Lick’ of color to the world!

Rolling Stones Joke Generator

Bringing to life the perfect Rolling Stones joke can sometimes feel like a tumbling dice situation.

(Get it?)

That’s where our FREE Rolling Stones Joke Generator swoops in to save the day.

Crafted to rock and roll puns, lively humor, and catchy phrases, it creates jokes that are guaranteed to get you satisfaction.

Don’t let your humor gather moss.

Use our joke generator to whip up jokes that are as timeless and energetic as the Rolling Stones.

FAQs About Rolling Stones Jokes

Why are Rolling Stones jokes so popular?

Rolling Stones jokes are popular because they blend humor with the band’s rich history and iconic status in music.

They can be enjoyed by both fans and those familiar with the Rolling Stones, offering a fun and witty take on this legendary rock band.

Can Rolling Stones jokes help in social situations?

Definitely!

Jokes about the Rolling Stones can be a great conversation starter, especially with music enthusiasts.

Sharing a Rolling Stones joke can lighten the mood and spark discussions about music, concerts, or the band’s history.

How can I come up with my own Rolling Stones jokes?

Learn about the Rolling Stones—their songs, band members, memorable moments, and interesting facts about their career.
Play with the band’s unique vocabulary, such as their song titles, lyrics, or the names of their albums.
Think about the context of your joke. Is it about a concert? A particular song or album? Make sure your humor aligns with this.
Use common phrases, sayings or popular culture references, and give them a Rolling Stones twist.
Don’t shy away from puns and wordplay. Rolling Stones jokes thrive on clever language and a playful approach!

Are there any tips for remembering Rolling Stones jokes?

One tip is to link Rolling Stones jokes to your favorite songs or memorable moments of the band.

Associating jokes with these can help make them more memorable.

How can I make my Rolling Stones jokes better?

The element of surprise is key.

Try to find unique connections or references that your audience might not expect.

Practice your delivery, and don’t be afraid to experiment with your humor.

Keep sharing your jokes to see what gets the best reaction.

How does the Rolling Stones Joke Generator work?

Our Rolling Stones Joke Generator is your source for instant laughs.

Simply enter relevant keywords, such as a song title, album name, or band member, and press Generate Jokes.

Within moments, you’ll be provided with a collection of hilarious Rolling Stones jokes.

Is the Rolling Stones Joke Generator free?

Yes, our Rolling Stones Joke Generator is totally free to use.

Generate as many jokes as you want, and keep your humor game strong with this tool.

Feel free to spread the laughs on your social media or at your next gathering.

Conclusion

Rolling Stones jokes are an entertaining way to add a touch of rock ‘n’ roll to everyday conversations, making life a bit more enjoyable with each chuckle.

From the quick and clever to the long and laughter-provoking, there’s a Rolling Stones joke for every occasion.

So next time you’re listening to a Rolling Stones track, remember, there’s humor to be found in every lyric, riff, and rock anthem.

Keep spreading the laughs, and let the good times rock and roll.

Because after all, a day without laughter is like a day without the Rolling Stones—unimaginable and, frankly, a bit less rocking.

Happy joking, everyone!

Rock ‘n’ Roll Jokes That Will Have You Laughing Out Loud

Drum Jokes That Will Beat Your Funny Bone

Classic Rock Jokes for a Timeless Chuckle

Guitar Jokes That Strike the Right Chord

Concert Jokes to Make Your Night More Entertaining